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It does not get this high, I promise. Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

What happens when my city street floods.

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Not my street, just an inaccurate dramatization. Photo by Filip Bunkens on Unsplash
  • Really terrible cars, mostly old, mostly low to the ground, but the occasional small truck or crossover. These can stall anyway, but they tend to do it when driven through high water. If you’re lucky, you can see the driver, often but not always a teenaged boy, wading through the temporary river to get away from the car.
  • Low, sporty, new cars, also low to the ground. These will ALWAYS have been driven by men, usually men in their 20s. Women and older men also drive sporty new cars; as far as I can tell, they do not drive them into standing water.
  1. Anger: Hitting the steering wheel, swearing, turning red — all signs that this person knows their car is now dead.
  2. Getting out of the car: This is really an extension of anger, and is one of the most satisfying parts of the process to watch. This driver is now fully cognizant of the fact that they’re stuck. They also know it’s their own fault. The person getting out of the car is furious at themselves, and they are also standing in knee-deep water. They may take it out on their car by kicking or cussing. They also may ask you for help pushing the car out of the water, so beware.
  3. Despair and calling a tow truck/friend/Uber to get home: This is the part where the person gives up on getting the car out of the water without outside assistance either through getting it started or pushing (you didn’t agree to help, did you?) and either summons help to get it out of the street or just decides to leave it there and go home.
  4. An abandoned car sits in the street: Also known as “Acceptance.”

I still write sometimes, and I have a buttload of already-written stuff. So there you go.

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